Talking about death is such a sensitive topic. Most people don’t mind to discuss it and some get annoyed. Tackling such topic makes them feel horrible to be exact. Who would have thought I’m open at it. Weird, isn’t it? To tell you guys, I have been in the state of “Near-Death-Experience”.

THE INCIDENT

In the evening of April 29, 2006, it was a fair night for me. I wasn’t thinking of anything may happen. All was so smooth, even a single possibility of being in danger was out of my mind. At exactly 10:55pm I was stabbed. I was with my friends and decided to go home early. I dropped-by to a nearby store (15 meters away from our house) and the owner warned me about the two guys behind staring viciously at me. When I looked back, they ogle to do something bad. So I hasten to go home without a word after the store owner handed me the change. By walking fast, I thought they’re not getting closer anymore. I was being so confident of reaching the house safe. But I was wrong. I never noticed they walked fast and haven’t heard their footsteps. Before reaching the gate, I felt I felt like someone has stapled my flesh and realized that I was stabbed at the upper left of my back.

After my parents knew what happened, they rushed me directly to the hospital of course without any delay. In the hospital, the doctor gave me 8 hours as an observation and if my condition is still unstable after the said hours, I would surely die.

AT THE HOSPITAL

Few hours later (the dawn of April 30), I felt an obstruction of breathing. It was like my lungs has gotten smaller and it hurts every time I breathe. My father never mentioned anything about their conversation with my internist (thanks to Dr. Red) the night before. The real thing was, my left lung’s sack got traumatized and little by little, it absorbed blood every time I breathe. That’s the reason why it hurts when I breathe. My case was called “Haemothorax”. An operation was needed the soonest.

The doctor decided to have my operation inside my room instead because I collapsed the nurses assisted me to the wheelchair heading to the Operating Room.

I heard my mom’s sob while my dad was holding my hands very tight. The doctor injected the anesthesia and began cutting the left part of my chest (an inch wide). But the worst thing was, he inserted his fingers (his two fingers) and asked me if it hurts. How stupid!!! But I felt numb. Then he inserted the flexible tube until it reached my lung’s sack. The tube’s purpose was to drain out the blood from the left lung. From the moment it started to drain, I fell unconscious.

UNCONSCIOUSNESS CAME

While I was unconscious, they’ve been observing me intensively. During the critical hours, I dreamed of something or wasn’t a dream either. But I could still remember it vividly. I saw myself lying flat on my bed, very pale and almost lifeless. The first thing came out from my mind- a doppelganger? I couldn’t cry, scream or being hysterical but I felt schmaltzy after seeing myself again. Then I heard someone’s calling my name. It was a sotto voce and an eerie man’s voice. I followed the voice it was behind the windows. How come? We’re on the 5^th floor!!! I admit that I have an intense fear of heights but I went out thought the windows without opening it. It was amazing because I was afloat and seeing the cars below tracking the streets busily. I’ve flown further and higher together with the birds while following the voice. I could see again the little cars on the road congested with traffic until I noticed that I was heading home. But before reaching the house, my consciousness retrieved.

I didn’t open my eyes yet though I’m awake. I felt cold and it’s like your body being dipped into a freezing-cold water. From head to toe, I felt like I’m frozen. I know I was alive but very weak and helpless. All I did was just a hush cry. I’M ALMOST DEAD!

LESSONS LEARNT

All the things happened in our life has its purpose. We don’t understand things first but later on, we’ll just realize. But the more positive we are, the quicker we understand the predicaments we had. God prodded us to be awakened to the truth. It’s a wake-up call.

He gave me the second chance to change. In spite of being tagged as a bad guy, I was able to prove that I’m not that such. I’ve learnt to live life in the right way and appreciate it again. Because of this experience, I’ve grown more mature. This is not an ersatz feeling, it’s true. And this is what I call “My Change”.